I jinxed myself with my last post, didn't I. Rar.

I bought all of my Christmas gifts on December 9th. One still hasn't arrived yet. Yep, it's December 29th.

I'd ordered a CD set of Charlie Parker's complete recordings on Verve. This was going to be a gift from my brothers and I to our father, as it's a $150 set. I looked on Amazon, and there was a seller through Amazon's marketplace thingy offering it new and factory sealed for $108. They had a 99% positive feedback, so I ordered it from them.

Ten days later, the package arrived. However, it had a CD set of folk songs in it, as well as the receipt for the order of someone in California. I immediately emailed the company, and this is all I got:

Thank you for the email. We will provide you with a prepaid return label, so that you may send back the mis-shipped order.

Great. Because I really give a crap on whether you get your stuff back or not. I emailed a reply asked when I'd get my CD set, and...I haven't heard from them since. The company is based out of chain of stores in New England, so I figured they were extreme dumbasses and had everyone take off for Christmas, but by December 27th, I hadn't heard anything from them, and I hadn't even received the prepaid return label they'd promised.

My mom tracked down a phone number for the company. I got a busy signal every time I tried calling. I tried to fill out their customer service form on their website. There's a bug in it that won't let me submit my complaint. So I sent them another email to their "customer service" address rather than their "orders" address, threatening to cancel the purchase on my credit card if I didn't hear anything.

Well, I didn't hear anything. I called my credit card company this morning, and started the process for a charge dispute. Hopefully that'll get the company off their assess and mail me my dad's gift. If anything, I buy it somewhere else and I have a $74 set of folk songs. Looking at the website where I first found this, I notice that their price for the Charlie Parker set has gone up to $115 and their positive feedback has dropped to 98%. Let's see if I can make it lower.

Season's Greetings

I love the holiday season, I really do. I love the lights and songs and yes, even the schmaltzy sentimentality. The only thing I don't like about it is agonizing over what to give as gifts. This year I think I set a personal best by managing to start and finish the entirety of my holiday shopping in one day - December 9th, to be exact.

Most of the shopping was done that night on Amazon, but the trip actually started the night before. I'd gone into Manhattan with my dad to go to Central Park, and the annual gathering that goes with the anniversary of the death of John Lennon. This was my fourth time going since 2000, and it might be the hundreds of people and even more candles, but I've never felt really cold there, despite the December weather.

I stayed over at my dad and stepmom's apartment that night, and in the morning went to Union Square, which has holiday gift vendors set up. On my way there, I passed hundreds of people marching down 3rd avenue yelling to free Tibet, and on 14th street I passed a gift store, which is where I ended up buying most of my gifts.

Anyway, I still spent almost two hours wandering through the vendors' booths, and here was my favorite item from my favorite booth.

Here's what it says, in case you can't read it: "Lookin' good for Jesus. Virtuous vanilla spf 18 lip balm. Be worthy, be noticed. Get tight with Christ!"

In case you're worried about the nature of the booth's merchandise, what I ended up buying there were a box of bandages that looked like strips of bacon.

This last photo is actually not from Union Square, but my local CVS.

Yes, that is a Christmas ornament. Look at the shape of it again if you didn't catch it the first time. That would be a magen David. I should have bought it. It's the perfect ornament for me, someone who celebrates both Chanukah and Christmas.

This coming week is the most stressful of the year, what with four performances and two night rehearsals. Coordinating all the kids this week is something that I like to refer to as the giant Tetris game, and that's just the start of everything that needs to be pulled off. But then I get to relax, get presents, and gorge myself on food. It's a nice trade-off.

How old am I, and how old do I want to be?

During my first year as a teacher, I kept being mistaken for a student. Not surprising, since I was only 3 1/2 years older than the oldest person I was teaching. But to be a first year teacher, and have your colleagues give you that look of confusion every time you try to associate with them, can grow from annoying to upsetting after a while, and I actually longed to be a little older, just so I can feel like I belonged in the right place.

It's now my second year of teaching, and since now I'm known in the building, and the other teachers have realized that I don't dress like a student (aka like a ho, but that's a separate issue), I have that feeling now. And when a new security guard asks me to sign in at night (the sign in's for students only), after I'd just told him all the directions for the rehearsal I was holding later that evening, I get to make him look like a dumbass when I pull out my keys and faculty ID.

Anyway, here's the point I'm trying to make. Today we had a half day at school, and I left work and drove straight to Rutgers to pick up my brother for Thanksgiving. I walk into his dorm in my work clothes, and my brother's roommate looks at him and says "that's your mom?" I wanted to look older and all, but not old enough so that I have a kid that's a sophomore in college! Geez!

I am high and low brow all at the same time!

I found this website where you can put in the url of your blog and they'll tell you the reading level required to understand your writing. Here's what happened when I put in this site:

Here's what happened when I put in the blogging I did over at Wordpress:

Some photos with some not-so-serious commentary.

This is the bottom of a bag of some delicious Stacy's pita chips.

Look at the phrase on the right. I can't have been the only person to read it the first time as "OMG cholesterol!" Stupid internet has altered my critical thinking skillz. Skills. Dammit.

The second photo comes courtesy of some political signage I spotted while visiting Jarret last weekend.

This could have been the best political ticket ever, but that guy Malone had to ruin it. (Too bad it's a republican ticket. They won.)

I need this week to go better than the last one.

This past week, I'd hoped that the worst thing that could happen would that I'd have no team to root for in the world series. (I still don't.) It's against my nature to root for the Red Sox, as Rudy should have known, and then I found out that it's impossible for me to root for the Rockies either. Sigh.

However, Wednesday morning, a whole period's worth of class time was shot when a kid decided to keel over and throw up on some chairs about five minutes after the class started (he's fine). On Friday morning, we lost most of rehearsal for another class when we had an evacuation after a bomb score.

But that was just at work. Thursday evening, my brother returned home to find that the house had been broken into. Our glass back door had been smashed in, the golf club used to do it (found lying around on our porch) left stranded on a chair. Bits of glass extended to all corners of the family room. We can't use the top lock to our front door anymore, since they'd originally tried to jimmy that open with a knife and got the tip stuck inside. The aforementioned glass smasher had apparently cut themselves while trying to open the door, as evidenced by this person staggering around drunk and leaving blood stains on the walls.

(The stickers on the door were so we wouldn't walk into clear glass. The sticker on the wall is from the police.)

How do we know they were drunk? How do I know to say "they?" Because the only thing missing in the entire house was almost every drop of alcohol we had, and there were no blood stains found by the liquor cabinet. Most of what was taken was hard liquor brought over from my grandmother's house in our search to sort out her things after her death, so it's more of a odd sentimental loss than material.

The worst part is, we know who was involved with this, the police agree with us, but no one can pin any evidence to convict anyone (yet...hopefully), and there's nothing we can do right now to make sure something like this doesn't happen again with worse things missing than alcohol.

This coming week actually has the potential to be worse for me, believe it or not, and I just don't want it to be. I just can't do it.

Hmm. Connecticut might want to read this.

Jonathan is home this weekend for my birthday, and he was being a jerk and randomly saying things to me, than randomly naming bible verses that they're from. I actually looked one of them up to prove him wrong. Here's what I found instead. It's, Amos 4:1-3. I didn't even know there was a book of Amos until now. (I claim Jew.)

1 Hear this word, you cows of Bashan on Mount Samaria,
you women who oppress the poor and crush the needy
and say to your husbands, "Bring us some drinks!"

2 The Sovereign LORD has sworn by his holiness:
"The time will surely come
when you will be taken away with hooks,
the last of you with fishhooks.

3 You will each go straight out
through breaks in the wall,
and you will be cast out toward Harmon,"
declares the LORD.

See that? All drunken waspish housewives who don't care about poor people will be carried out of their houses by hooks! The bible said so, it must be true!

Fictional characters coming out brings out the nerd in me.

J.K Rowling Reveals that Dumbledore was Gay

This obviously makes some story lines of book 7 viewed from a different perspective. Now, when I imagine the duel between Dumbledore and Grindelwald in my head, it's like the end of Revenge of the Sith. Just imagine:

"You were the chosen one! You were supposed to bring balance to the Deathly Hallows, not leave it in darkness! I loved you, Grindelwald!"

All the news that's fit to put on tv.

I've been a fan of Bob Harris since he first appeared on Jeopardy almost ten years ago, although I hadn't really remembered it was him until I read his first book. Anyway, he's finished his second book, Who Hates Whom:Well-Armed Fanatics, Intractable Conflicts,and Various Things Blowing Up:A Woefully Incomplete Guide™, and here's an animated version of something that he pondered while writing it. It's a good point.

A story

The other day I was waiting for my food at a diner when I decided to use the restroom. It's a very small restroom, two stalls, hardly anyone is ever in it.

Except for this time, both stalls were taken, one of them by a mother with two toddler daughters, with her not bothering to close the stall door to hoist the younger girl over the toilet seat. As I entered the room, she was yelling "Why are you wearing a diaper? I thought you were wearing pull-ups today..." The occupant of the other stall came out and informed me that it didn't have any toilet paper left, and I'd have to take some from the other stall.

Of course, the harried mother hadn't even noticed I was there. As I pondered for a second whether to ask her for toilet paper, the other daughter tugged on her mother's sleeve. "Mommy, hurry up! I have to pee too!" Mommy turned her head around and yelled at her, "You'll have to wait! She's going poopies!"

I didn't have to go that badly. I waited until I got home.

Busy! But here's a life update.

School started three weeks ago. I've either been too busy or too tired to post anything.

School is definitely starting more smoothly than last year, but that doesn't mean it's all good, either. A lot of new stuff got thrown at us that we're trying to sort out, from a new schedule to work lessons around to little things like dripping pipes and holes in the wall.

Jarret got a teaching job as well, a leave replacement position, which means he's a certified substitute, writing up his own lessons and teaching, but still getting paid like a substitute teacher, only with more money than a regular sub gets. The place where he's teaching is a lot closer to my house than his, so he's staying with me a few nights a week now. It's a happy thing.

Some of my electronics are getting hand me down upgrades. My five year old computer is running out of space, so I'm upgrading to my mom's old computer, which is only a couple of years younger, but has a lot more space and a tv tuner/recorder in it. A good thing for when I have school functions at night. (Ugly Betty, Grey's Anatomy, and ER premiere this Thursday, and I have Back-to-School Night! Gah!) Mom and Jeff spent like an entire afternoon bringing that comp back from the dead, so I'm grateful. Also, to solve the problem of a broken tv at my mom's, we moved my grandma's tv to my dad's house, and my tv at dad's to my mom's. Zero dollars spent for me. Maybe I inherited this trait from my dad, who fixed the computer in his house by switching power supplies with another computer from his office. Keep in mind he acquired this computer from work for free when they upgraded their computers.

I shall leave this post with something about my brother Bryan, who has become a gym rat and eating pretty much nothing but turkey sandwiches, yogurt, and hard boiled eggs these past few months. On Friday, I came home from work, and Bryan said to me "hide the snacks next time." You see, Jarret and I had gone grocery shopping for when he stays over. One of things I had bought was a pack of Double-Stuf Oreos, which I'd had a craving for since my dream about them a while back. I'd eaten two of them. Bryan had eaten the rest. In one sitting. Holy crap.

Nifty.

My car is old enough that I can catch this on the odometer.

Cool.

Awesome dream!

I dreamt last night that there was such a thing as Triple-Stuf Oreos.

WANT.

This can be done. I just need a pack of Double-Stuf Oreos and a pack of regular Oreos....

Simpsons Movie

Worth seeing. I liked it.

That is all, for there were too many quotables to list here.

Quote of the day

(My mom is trying to get my brother from eating more food)

"Your brother is losing weight, I'm losing weight, Jeff's losing weight, and Liz is...(looking over at me) eating candy..."

Oh yeah.

More Pottery Questions

Spoilers for Deathly Hallows (which I loved), but not that much.

• What subject did Dumbledore teach at Hogwarts before becoming Headmaster? Wikipedia says transfiguration, but is that anywhere in the books?
• So...when exactly did Ron, Hermione and Harry pass their apparition tests?
• Is the wizarding world Christian? They celebrate Christmas, Mrs. Weasley says "Thank God," but it's not like any of them have ever gone to church...
• I still don't think Snape was truly good, despite the big reveal. If James Potter had been married to anyone else but Lily Evans, Snape would never have asked Voldemort to spare anyone, and never gone to Dumbledore full of remorse. He would have been a Death Eater through and through if it weren't for her.
  

Do Not Disturb Me Tomorrow.

Well, it's an hour away until Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows is officially released. My brother and I are very excited. Other brother has finally started reading the books, and is about halfway through Goblet of Fire. My mom has watched the movies, but insists that I should download it online now. Want book. And I'm not going to someplace at midnight and buying it then, because when I get my hands on that book I want to read it immediately, and I want to be fully awake for it. I had to take a nap through my first reading of Half Blood Prince because my eyes were blurring the words.

Funny story (well, not really) on how I might not obtain the copy I preordered from Amazon tomorrow. I set the order to be shipped to my dad's house, as that's where I usually am on Saturday. Dad left for Europe on Tuesday, and stopped his mail. If it's not at the post office for me to pick up, I'm going to have to go buy another copy, or wait for my brother to finish reading the copy he intends to buy tomorrow morning.

So why did I just go into my Amazon account and change the shipping address? Don't think I didn't try. I realized this address faux pas a week before the book was due to ship, and realized that my account wouldn't let me do anything to the order. I emailed Amazon to see what was up, and I got an email back saying that since the item was shipping soon, they can't do anything about it. Their solution? Place another order to my mom's address, and by the way, they can't cancel the other order. Fuck you, Amazon. If I'm buying another copy, it won't be from you.

Anyway.

In honor of the release of the last book, here are some random thoughts I've had about the series lately, given my reading of books one, five and six over the past month or so.

1. Voldemort is 71 years old at the time of the last book, according to what we know about his age from Chamber of Secrets. Does he act like an old man? No. Is Ralph Fiennes made up to look like an old man? No. So how do we account for this? Eleven years without a body? Six pieces of his soul put in horcruxes? I guess so. On a similar note, the same storyline makes Hagrid 68. But then again, Hagrid is half giant, so who knows how long he can live.
2. So if these characters are that old...how old was Dumbledore? I saw a website that put his birthdate in the 1840s! So we can assume that he stayed alive through Elixir of Life given to him by Nicholas Flamel, but at the end of the first book, Dumbledore tells Harry that Flamel and his wife have enough elixir to set their affairs in order and then they will die. So that would mean Dumbledore would soon die too, but he obviously did not die of old age. Confusing. (Edit: I found an interview with J.K Rowling that says that wizards have much longer life expectancies. Okie dokie.)
   
3. Draco Malfoy seems to be the only Hogwarts student to say anything like "Wait until my father hears about this." I'm surprised that their aren't more parents complaining about their children's education. I'm not just talking about the dangerous stuff like the Chamber of Secrets opening and dementors prowling the grounds, I mean little things that were it a real school, it would have angry parents calling day and night. I know I'd be pissed if I had a kid that was sorted into Hufflepuff.
4. How come you never see a homesick kid anyway? Eleven year old kids away from home for the first time? No owls begging mommy to come and pick them up?
5. What do wizard children learn education-wise before they enter Hogwarts? Math, science, grammar? Does that all stop at age 11?
6. How many Muggle parents decide not to send their children to Hogwarts? Do they ignore the letters like the Dursleys and then have multiple letters sent to them? Are their representatives sent to explain what the hell's going on? How to the Muggles get to Diagon Alley?
7. Last, but not least, the Snape debate. I'm happy to say that I remain completely unspoiled, so these are just thoughts here. I'm thinking that Snape's on the bad side. I know Dumbledore trusted him, but like McGonagall (my favorite character) said, she never could figure out why. He did make the unbreakable vow to Narcissa Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange, but that was just to protect Draco, and that can be worked around. Then there was the heresay conversation between Snape and Dumbledore that Hagrid relayed to Harry, and some think that was Dumbledore convincing Snape to kill him (and to that I still say why?????), but...you can't do the avada kedavra curse and not truly mean it. Snape might have been an awesome wizard and all, but if he had been the least bit reluctant to kill Dumbledore, it shouldn't have worked, right?

Okay, I'm done.

Emmy Nods

Awards show whore that I am, I'll just point out that two of the nominees for best song are "Dick in a Box" and "Everything Comes Down to Poo."

I am five.

Found it.

Sigh.

Thomas Morley in the hizzy!

I am enough of a dork to think this is funny.

Okay, over here now.

It just didn't seem to me like anyone (except for Jarret) was reading the blog I had over at Wordpress.

So I'm over at Blogger. I like it better than Wordpress's setup, and I would have been over here before if it hadn't given me such a bitchy time last winter to set up something.

And look, Jarret! It's pink!